to be of use

jump into work head first
...swim off with sure strokes almost out of sight.
... pull like water buffalo, with massive patience,
... strain in the mud and the muck to move things forward,
... do what has to be done, again and again.
...The pitcher cries for water to carry
and a person for work that is real.
-Marge Piercy, sections from a poem called "to be of use"
tomorrow is my first day back at an office in almost years. what a run. can't wait.

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Sigur Ros

No matter the language it’s amazing how the human spirit is still translated thru melody and rhythm.

Here is a rough translation i found.

You tried everything
Yes, a thousand times
Experienced enough
Been through enough
But you it was who let everything
Into my heart
and you it was who once again
Awoke my spirit

I parted, you parted

You stir up
In a blender
Everything in disarray
But it was you who was always
There for me
It was you who never judged
My true friend

I parted, you parted

You sail on rivers
With an old oar
Leaking badly
You swim to shore
Pushed the waves away
But to no avail
You float on the sea
Sleep on the surface
Light through the fog

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be the change


relating to deep inward feelings rather than to the intellect.


of, relating to, being, or involving conscious intellectual activity.

there are moments when i’m able to view my life outside of myself. moments i realize profound things about who i am and who i’d like to be.

this past weekend commemorated my well established adulthood with another birthday. no more if’s, and’s, or but’s about it,  i am a man.  and with this realization comes another, i’m proud of the man i am but i feel far from complete. that is to say i can see a lot of things i’d like to be better at, many more goals for achievement and ways in which i want to grow.

i’m proud of my accomplishments, for example i’ve established my talents to allow me to innovate and create professionally and i’m very good. i’m aware and conscious of life outside of my world. i understand that just bc i’m having a bad day it doesn’t mean it’s my right to take that out in any direction but internally. its not always easy but i accept my hardships and overcome them. i’ve remained young at heart and curious til the end.  i still care for people without exception. and i never hesitate to live life’s moments for everything they are.

i think it’s a fair list of things to be proud of but with realization of these areas of pride i also acknowledge the areas in which personal growth must be had to achieve my goal.

-i need to get back to my visceral, i think far too much. the times when i acted like an idiot-kid are over but it doesn’t mean everything in my life must have logic and a plan. feel it more!

-i can’t just hang out with people that show me no love, default friends are over. it really takes a toll on me. new york in general has hardened me to being affectionate with people, throw in being around people that couldn’t care less about my well fare just brings me down. don’t cling to those who don’t perpetuate feelings of warmth.

-say less but make what you say more meaningful. after years of adjusting to people without any close friends or family in new york i continue to need to make people understand what i’m saying. i silence my frustration with people for no good reason. give up that need to make everyone understand bc some people don’t listen and others dont want to hear. the people that do will ask. speak less but say more.

-caring about people is one thing but taking action must be done to make things change for them. whether its volunteering, speaking your mind more, or something completely different figure it out. if you want to help people then you need to do it, not just think about it.

-be warmer to people, don’t wait for people to show you signs of warmth. throw them out and if they don’t come back dont turn them into coldness, just move on.

-don’t look for praise on everything good thing you do, this is what you do. no one needs to know, it’s about the action not recognition or achievement. you spread goodness for goodness sake. that’s what you’re about.

-be on time everywhere. this one is easy -just get it done, you’re the man you want to be and that man is on time and dependable for people. always.

-go after what you want with 100% conviction. weighing out how much i really want something has become a routine, one that has led me to hesitation too often. it is important that i grow past the cognitive need to justify and follow my instincts. be alive and go for what you want without hesitation.

-embrace change. its said that the only true constant is change, know that and don’t ever become ridge to it. say yes to change always before you say no!

-last one, find your sense of cool and relax with it. the coolest thing you’ve ever done is be cool enough to instill relaxation in others thru your presence. find it again and be confident enough to not lose your cool.

all people share two inherent approaches to every situation in life. Cognitive or Visceral. two choice methods to all situations in our lives, do i use my intellectual sense or do i let my feelings dictate my actions and words. it’s time to bring these in balance to move on to the next chapter of being.

be proud. you’ve come from nothing to be able to make a difference now. now be the change you wanted to see.

ps- this is really a note to myself not so much a blog post.

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Wynwood Gallery Walk


To some up my experience this past Saturday at Miami’s Gallery I can only think to say the single coolest night of art I’ve ever experienced. On the drive there we drove through blocks and blocks of graffiti murals created for this year’s Art Basel, a fantastic concept, artists are given around 30 feet on a completely white wall to create on. After a curator makes the festival aware of who’s pieces are where. Below each piece on the street lay tags of other artists that came and appreciated the work.

After a 15 minute drive and the eventual finding of a parking space in this former warehouse district for foot factories and chop shops we arrived at our destination. A promotional event thrown by 42 Below, free drink and food, live music and our first gallery. Over the course of the next two hours we roaming from party to party enjoying free cocktails and viewing some of the best art work Miami has to offer in crowded(but not too crowded) party like galleries in the Wynwood. For anyone looking for an experience  that’s right with a Saturday night in Miami a MUST SEE.

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Once there was a way to get back homeward


“Once there was a way to get back homeward”

Well after a trip back to Florida and a family reunion I feel as though I found the way. It’s quite amazing to see my family and how everyone has grown. It’s still very much a mystery to how I came out so different from everyone and if my new york world could ever handle the over-the-top nature of my family but none the less a wonderful time. Seeing children that you once held in your hand driving cars and holding their own children in there hands is a surreal feeling but one that i believe adds great perspective to the big picture.

life is an amazing and beautiful thing.


“and in the end, the love you take….is equal to the love….you make”

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Mad Men: Joy


What I consider to be the sexiest Mad Men I’ve ever seen. Also the first episode I ever saw. Joy you hooked me.

Next Episode:

Don repairs a chair while Anna does a tarot reading. The chair fixed, he notices a copy of Frank O’Hara’s Meditations in an Emergency. She says the poems made her worry about him. Asked if he should be worried about the cards, she says they reveal that he’s unhappy only because he believes he’s alone.

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The best way to be happy…

“The best way to be happy is just to make the other person happy”

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